Tamar and Avi are an American couple in their late thirties who made aliya to Israel two years ago with their four children. They presented to couple therapy in distress. They reported that they argued frequently about their children, their in-laws, household tasks and money. Tamar said she felt that Avi took her for granted and had no idea what her life was like. Avi complained, “We hardly ever have sex.”
After a meaningful introductory session, where each partner felt heard and validated, I invited the couple to return at the same time weekly to begin therapy. Before we would begin joint therapy, I explained that I first wanted each partner to come alone for one session, in order to get to know each of them better.